its summertime. vacation bible school week has just ended. all of our little ones have performed their last act until next summer. my sweet little boy nestled amongst all the other little faces and hands as they show their very proud parents how they are learning to worship God. he tends to hold back a bit; my little boy. but, somehow he is always surrounded by others who are willing to look out for him. showing him the way. reminding him of the motions for a certain song. this time he worked really hard to keep up with the lyrics and all of the motions. a couple of times i caught that look he has about him when he is feeling anxious. but we always sit where he can see us. mama and daddy are always there to cheer him on. reassuring. showing confidence that i know he isn't feeling. however, when all is said, or sung, and done, he smiles for the pictures as he relaxes into who he is.
my sweet little boy reaches for the expected hugs and kisses. and i know he won't be long in wanting more of them. he squeezes tight like a competition on who hugs the strongest. he's a funny little guy. he turns 6 on the 4th of july. his daddy and i watch while he plays among his friends from sunday school and church. he's so little in comparison. we look at each other and smile. we never fail to comment on that fact. but he doesn't seem to mind. everybody knows him. we are so blessed to have a church home and family to love him right along with us.
in the morning hours he wakes and comes to get me to watch cartoons only to fall back asleep when he climbs up into my bed. i have another hour or two before he wakes again. the sweetness that comes from a child when first he wakes. sleepy eyes, yawns and stretching. and the sound of his soft breath. slumber calls him back. our days blessedly easy once we do get started. mornings are full of sweets for breakfast and spongebob piled up on the sofas with the dogs and cat. its comfortable.
our days are filled with what we want while waiting for daddy to come home from work. we take our days one at a time and choose to be messy or maybe not. toys and books and blankets and games line up straight thru the middle of the house. a game of hide and seek when i least expect it. he's so funny. his little body fits into the smallest of spaces; helped along by pillows and toys scattered willy nilly. and he even helps with the laundry if i decide it needs to be done. and i hear him ask "can i have a hug?" of course! and here's another until the next time...
winding down the evening with our favorite shows, books, or games we may have another snack or two. but thats ok. no need to rush and worry during summer vacation. while daddy may have to succumb to his work-a-day slumber my little boy and i play games sitting side by side on into the night. finally realizing my sweet child is fighting the sleep that calls to him too, he still wiggles and burrows until he settles into my lap. and, like always, landing in the same position he drops off to sleep. he is so used to being held and cuddled i find myself combing thru his hair with my fingers long after he is sound asleep. there is no hurry to put him to bed. i'm so glad.
i am the sentinal. the night's guard of that soft sweet boy yet to be carried off to his own bed. i think back over the years it took for us to get him to sleep in that bed. like sleeping with a wind mill as his father and i clung to the edges of our mattress to make room. i knew in his first week of life he would claim a large portion of room for sleeping. all arms and legs going at once. i was so tired in those early days. strange how those 4 long years seem to have flown by.
and now, as i rise to carry this soft sweet child to his bed, he sighs. the sweetness of that soft breath reassuring me that he is well. he is safe. all is calm. the night is quiet. the sounds of our home comforts him. he insists that his lamp be left on thru the night. and thru the night i hear his dreams. the monitor carrying those sweet sighs into my room. into my slumber. my child's soft breath.