leaping out of my box?

i can't believe i'm actually going to try this~! i'm a bit scared of the fact that i'm really in a box and never thought of it that way. but surely i am. there is so much i would love to change about myself. everything from getting on a schedule and staying on it to decluttering my entire home. (my husband would think he had died and gone to heaven!) if only for that reason i haven't already done it speaks volumes about me. i suppose i've been quite selfish. so sad. it is said that if you do one particular thing for 21 days it becomes a habit. well. in this "leap of faith," basically, we have 30 days. more than enough time to change so much! right? so, that being said... here i go;)

i have so much to learn...

i've spent the better part of the weee hours trying to get to my blog and post something! just getting here was an outrageous task! of course, it would help if i remembered my new blog (yes, this one) has a different sign in. i just want to yank my hair out. eventually i will get the hang of this and become a more relaxed and engaging sort that can blog like there is no tomorrow...........

i have a little couch potato...

you've all heard the phrase "couch potato" and with it comes the vision of a very sloppy person who only moves to retrieve something from the fridge and/or more munchies. well, not my little couch potato.

my max reminds me of a mr potato head but in constant motion. he absolutely loves our couch. hence, i have a little couch potato.

our couch is a huge curved piece of furniture that i decided to turn into a sectional. and, not to mention it is soooo comfortable. its covered in pillows. it has big pillow backs and many throw pillows. these pillows have been the source of many hours of fun for max. he doesn't just rearrange them he makes them into something.

its also a practice stage for jumping, flipping, building and hiding. of course there are also several blankets involved for tent making and torturing maggie, our chihuahua. might i mention that max has learned when maggie's had enough. regardless, max continues to arrange and rearrange so as to throw us off in a game of hide and seek.

we bought our couch before max came along. i remember lying on our original couch one night and opened one eye when a particular commercial came on and i said there's my couch. and so it was. as a matter of fact there is not another couch like it for miles around. the couch we bought was the actual couch in the commercial (rather the same fabric). it is covered with stars! and at first we babied it. it cost a mere fortune. sort of. but my dear husband would go into hysterics if one of our dogs jumped on it. and by all means would someone please explain how to keep a cat off the furniture...

anyway, as max has grown he has loved the couch in so many ways. lately he's been such a little cuddle bug. when he finally decides to settle down for the night he will either lay on his daddy's chest (yes, still lays on daddy's chest and will be 5 on july 4) and drift away or cuddle up next to me and go to sleep sitting up. and there are some nights when we try to move him to his bed and he catches us and wants to stay on his beloved couch.

i'm sure this will be our only couch until max graduates from college. but i don't think he will really be the epitome of a real couch potato. he's never still long enough to be one.

the pink ribbon in my heart...

i have a friend named carol who lives so many hours away that i can't give her a real hug. she deserves great big huge hugs every day. she is living with breast cancer.

i won't sit here and pretend to understand all that has happened to her. i only know the suffering that she bares. the jargon is so foreign. i only know she fights. she screens her calls. but, that's something she's always done. and her voice has always been a happy voice. do you know what a happy voice sounds like sooooo far away? i do. in my minds eye i can still see her smiling which always carried a laugh along with it. i've never known her to be a sad person at any time.

we haven't seen each other in over 20 years. but i'm here and she's there. and right now that's all that matters. she's there. i still hear her laughing. carol's smile and laughter has always come to mind when i think "i need to send her an email" or call and leave a message.

i remember when i heard from her last summer and she gave me that terrible news. those ugly words... breast cancer. my first thoughts were to try and make arrangements to go and see her. i remember thinking i've got to make sure i see her before she leaves this earth. oddly enough i remember her telling me she could at least get a jump start on her christmas cards since she wouldn't feel up to doing very much. you see, my friend has always made her own cards. i've always looked forward to getting my card from her. not just a christmas card, but, a birthday card as well. or maybe i would get lucky and get a valentine's card. i've framed some of her cards. i've saved them all. i could hear the smile in her voice when she told me about her christmas cards.

she gave me a scare recently. talk about me being scared. silly that i would be when she most likely is every moment of her life. i had sent an email. i had called and left a message on her phone. i worried and worried. i told my husband i didn't know if carol's husband would think to call me or send me something telling me she was gone. i have rarely spoken to the man. i remember when she got engaged. he is the kind of man that chooses a diamond and then has it set for his perfect bride. only to our, her friends, surprise that they got married in the middle of a week. i think it was valentine's day. as well that it was because i remember her telling me she wouldn't marry him until she decided by what name she wanted to be known. but for them it was perfect. nothing traditional. just simple and elegant. i only know this from the pictures i got to see. all that aside i worried that too much time had passed for a reply. so, i asked my husband to search the net for anything regarding her. what an awful task to search the obituaries for someone you love.

i finally heard from her in reply to my email. from what i could gather in that foreign jargon regarding the cancer she told me about something she should have decided to do in the beginning. however, she had chosen another route to her recovery. basically she hit a brick wall. after all was said and done, it wasn't done. now she bides her time making another decision regarding her cancer.

since that last email i've heard no more. early on i "scrapped" her a page and framed it. i had so much i wanted to say on that page and i did my best. she loved it saying she was hanging it where she could see it everyday. i want to do more, but, i don't know what. i've walked. i've prayed. and i still pray. i've always missed her. our lives took us in different directions. somehow we've stayed connected and i'm so thankful for that.

so if my friend reads this, and i hope she does, i want her to know i love her so much. regardless of all the miles i can remember her smiles.

max and maggie

i've jinxed myself!

a friend of mine wrote to me today. she said she was just sitting there. she had writer's block. this i could not believe because she has such an overwhelming wealth of knowledge on so many different levels.

so here i sit. having written, erased, written, only to erase again. while i sit here and wonder what level i'm on the best thing i could do is to pass her blog address along to you...

http://www.familysanityreviews.com/

and to think; i was so busy today.

the opportunity...

my husband's nephew, christopher, who i totally adore, preached for his very first time today. he is 20 years old. i met christopher when he was 11. he reminded me so much of my own son. at the time we did not have max. my son, cameron, was 15 at the time. i suppose that was part of the adoration i have for christopher. their personalities are so much alike. anyway, i digress...

mike, max, and i had intentions of attending sunday school at our church then drive to my husband's childhood/family church which is an hour away. oddly enough when you leave our house at 11am you get to that church at 11am. so odd. however, due to max waking in the night and causing loss of sleep on my part we didn't make it to sunday school. this also meant we were 15 minutes late getting to church. fortunately services had not begun. mostly due to the fact that there were many young people who had come to hear christopher speak. and so he did.

as i sat beside his mother, mike's sister, the tears welled in our eyes as we watched this young man of just 20 years of age speak the truth to his peers. mike and i had heard that christopher was nervous and he didn't want his father there to hear him. his father never attends anyway. but, there was that inkling in the back of his head that his dad just might show up. i told mike he wouldn't show. why? because he knows his son. and he didn't want to be preached to; putting him to shame. i know the reality of not getting to see your son "step up to the plate" with such confidence. there in itself lies the shame if you have the opportunity and you don't take it.

afterwards there was a pot luck dinner (lunch) in the fellowship hall. max was the youngest in the crowd and very inquisitive. he had discovered the graveyard beside this very old country church. his grandparents (mike's parents) are both buried there. and his great grandparents as well. his little mind was so full of questions.

by the time we made it back home it was time for our evening services. max had been attending vacation bible school all week and it was time for the kids to show off with songs and a skit. it was wonderful. our little max was on the front row on the right end sitting in one of his teachers' lap. for one solid hour that child didn't open his mouth or smile. it might as well been his daddy up there. i noticed a little girl standing next to him trying her best to get him to sing and do the motions to the songs. and max wasn't about to do any of it. however, mama and daddy were there to cheer him on; smiling, waving, and taking way too many pictures that will all look basically identical. but it doesn't matter. he was all smiles when we ran up front to get him when the singing was over.

we showed up for our "almost" 5yo to celebrate and eat ice cream and donuts.

catching up with a few pictures from the house on moss...



max's very first frog. of course he was being silly while i was taking a picture. this is the frog from the post 'kitty and the frog"...

and after several days of captivity the little frog was let out into our yard. hopefully kitty won't bring froggy back in!

a fresh cut bouquet from a dear friend's yard. she kept the blue and gave me the lavendar. they come from bushes that are 40 years old!

kitty on the sofa, maggie and bella on the ottoman. maggie must think she's a princess. she was obviously the only one to pose for the camera.

a beautiful handmade card from max on mother's day... i had several surprises that day!

greg being a good sport about his "wedgy" with a little help from courtney and max. his boxers match max's shoes, although max wasn't wearing them. skull and bones!


so many things can go unnoticed nor given a thought. this is my way of remembering the little things that go on in, around, and about our home. it is said "don't sweat the small stuff" and i know. i've read the book. but its the small stuff that brings meaning to our lives. they fill our hearts and they touch our souls. it is the small stuff that dreams are made of...

the frog and kittie

last night i was talking on the phone to my mom when i realized there was something on the top of my pantry door frame. now i'm sitting in my living room thinking what is that? i can see across the room and into the kitchen and it looks like there is a hole over the door frame. now i knew this couldn't be right because we just had the kitchen painted a few weeks ago and a hole would have never gone unnoticed. so i immediately yell for my husband to check it out. of course my little max runs into the kitchen to see what's happening and all the while i'm yelling "what is it?" to which my husband is yelling back "i don't know yet!" mike finally realized it was a frog. a frog on the top of my pantry door frame! the next thing i see is mike with a little glass jar that one would put homemade jam in. as i watch my husband he carefully places the little jar up and over the frame with the lid ready to close it up. he has captured the frog and my little max is amazed. its his first frog! well, earlier in the evening i had noticed that our cat, perfectly named kittie, had come in thru the doggie door yowling. and you need to know that the doggie door is in the master bedroom. so when kittie came in she walks through the living room and into the kitchen with a constant yowling that continued for about 10 minutes. although i wondered what in the world was wrong i kept a steady conversation with my mom on the phone. i really didn't want to investigate the situation. so after the lively conversation with my mother had ended i decided to try and figure out just how that frog landed on the top of the door frame. now kittie likes to attack whatever moves in the yard. so typical of any cat i've ever known.

ever read the story about jonah and the whale...